Every relationship is unique in its own way and everyone have their different opinions about love and relationship. But there are few very common and easy to understand relationship tips that are worth paying heed to. If you don’t want to spoil your growing relationship or want to get hitched to someone then follow these tips for a healthy relationship.
Being in a relationship is not a piece of cake. Love comes with its own set of complications for every individual couple. Truly speaking, finding is love is not that hard as it is to maintain the love and relationship for a lifetime. Though there are no fixed rules and regulations while being in a relationship but some of the tips provided below would definitely help you out.
For making your love life much easier, here are some great advice from the relationship advisors themselves –
- It is okay to go to bed while you are angry. You had a fight with your partner and feel like not talking to them and go to bed. Then do it. According to the relationship advisors, there is an actual science which says it is much better to go and sleep being angry rather than waking up late night to solve your relationship problems. Waking up till late stresses out your body and makes you feel more irritated and arrogant which in turn can make the situation even worse. Go to sleep instead and find out that your body is much more relaxed and your mind is at peace unlike the last night’s fight.
- It is your right to have a “me” time. Every individual have their own space where they would not tolerate the interference of anyone else. And asking for the privacy and space to spend some alone time with yourself is no crime at all. The main reason behind the success of the relationship amongst most of the couples is the acknowledgement of the private space that every individual have. They give each other plenty of time to spend wherever and however they want. If you both are totally involved into each other’s life then the relationship becomes monotonous and dull after some years. Give time and space to each other so that you both can get indulged into some new hobbies or can clear your thoughts or just enjoy ‘me’ time. This way you both get new topics to talk about.
- There are other words like ‘Thank You’ which also shows love. Saying thank you to your partner for any smallest of the gestures is a great step towards a healthy relationship. Saying I Love You all the time does not suffice but a single thank you makes them feel acknowledged. They get to know that you do notice what special or loving gestures you do for them. Who doesn’t like to be appreciated? Thank your partner for the everyday task even if it is not worth being thankful for. Appreciate them genuinely and you’ll see the growth in your relationship.
- Confront your partners about the things that annoy you. No matter how much small the thing may be, but you need to let your partner know about it. You do not like being tickled or do not like the shoes being thrown all over the floor or whatever it is. Confront them about it. It is necessary for them to know that you do not like it and it annoys you. Eventually, these small things become the reason for a successful and unsuccessful relationship. Don’t nag about things all the time but do it in non-hurting way instead. Talking about annoying things at the time when they don’t even matter is better than pointing them out at the time of fights. You know how worse the situation can get.
- Trying using the ‘I’ statement to convey your feelings to your partner. It is a common human nature to get our defenses up whenever we hear anything bad about us, and if the statement starts with a ‘YOU’ then it is definitely going to be disastrous. The sentence which begins with ‘I’ shows love and compassion if used properly. The couple therapist Elisabeth Lamotte who is the founder of the DC Counseling and Psychotherapy Centre says, avoid saying words like “You are so busy these day. We haven’t even gone on a date for so long.” It will get your partner’s defenses high and it would turn into a fight. Instead you can say that “I am feeling less connected these days and would love to spend some quality time with you.” You see how the beginning of the sentence changed the meaning completely.
- It is necessary for you to create intimacy of your minds. The main point of focus here is that you need to understand each other better for a healthy relationship. Even if you have been long together, it is essential for you to connect intellectually as well as emotionally. Talk about the stuff other than home, work, relationship or friends. You can ask any questions to your partner which may or may not involve your interest. It will deepen your understanding for each other.
- No technology day. Yes it is very essential for you to stay connected with the happenings around you but more than that you should prioritize your time for your loved ones. For a day or two in a week, you can manage to stay just with each other and keeping all the phones, laptop and TV switched off. Spend time with each other. Sit together or do something together. Just the two of you.
- A couple who fights is the ones that love a lot. Yes it is very true. There is no love without fights and where there are no fights, there is no love. But make sure that the fights are not stretched for long and are occurring frequently. Even if you fight with each other, you should be decent enough to maintain the dignity of each other and of the love that you both share. Dating coach, Tracey Steinberg says, “Even if you have fights, which are very normal between the couples, it is necessary that you both communicate to each other respectfully and maintain the dignity.” Do not destroy your relationship over a stupid fight.
- When in a relationship, every decision has to be made mutually. You are no more single now. Whatever decision you take might have some or the other effects on your partner. So it is recommended by the dating experts that a couple must always check with the partner before taking the smallest of the decisions. Do not just through your decision at them. Make them feel involved into the decision making process. You will eventually notice that they are okay with things that make you happy.
- Treat others like the way you want to get treated. Give Respect, Take Respect. It is a lifelong golden rule for a happy and healthy relationship. Give them what you want from them. There is not competition about staying stuck to a point for long. If you feel any problem in the relationship then get up and be the one to take initiative.
- Physical touches are magical. Physical touches are not just limited to the sexual ones. But holding hands, pecks on cheeks or forehead, keeping a hand on their waist in public are some of the romantic and physical form of intimacy. Touch them often this way. It will show your love and care towards your partner. A long relationship becomes monotonous because of the lack of the causal physically intimate touches which keeps the spark in a couple high.
- Being forever together is boring, let’s make it fun. Grab your wedding dress and sneak out to a fun place for an adventurous time with your partner. Relive your life like you earlier used to do. Don’t go the same old restaurant or order the same old meal and sit silent. Instead dress up like you are about to go on a date and talk to each other like you haven’t met before. Add fun, adventure and life to your long relationship. It will help you to stay together even longer.
- Communication is a must. Communication is a highly misinterpreted word in the world. People think that they are communicating but truly they are not even close. For an effective communication, it is important that a free flow of information occurs with a thorough understanding by the other person. Tell your partner about your feelings and thoughts openly. But communication should be in a constructive way. It should not just be limited to you or to them only. You both are an integral part of the communication, so you both must be involved completely in it.
- Love yourself first. People in a relationship often forget to love and treat themselves better and thus, loses the confidence in them. For being an active participant in the relationship, it is necessary that you feel energetic and happy from within. Treat yourself like a king or queen, do things which you like. Those things will make you happy and boost up your confidence level. As the relationship expert, Dr. Carole Lieberman says, “It is impossible to love someone else without loving yourself first”.
- Small reminders of how much you love them can do wonders. There would be a time in your life when you would not be able to say loving words directly to your partner. For these moments, you can create some small reminders or letters in which you compliment them about how beautiful and lovable they are. Individuals in a relationship like to give affirmation to each other, which makes their life easier and happier.
- You don’t choose THE ONE, you become THE ONE. It is an illogical concept of waiting for ‘The One’. There is no such thing like the one and only special person. A real relationship have seen all of the phases and have grown mature with the passage of time, and eventually your partner turns out to be The One for you. There is an amazing line said by Fitzpatrick – “We don’t find or choose THE ONE. We grow in love and become THE ONE for each other.”
Do you still want to save your relationship and want to make it a successful one? Then follow these tips which will turn the tables for you and would definitely bring you closer to your partner. Love is all about being with each other in all ups and downs and fighting with them together.